💡 50 Tips For A Better Life
date
Oct 1, 2024
slug
50-Tips-For-A-Better-Life
status
Published
tags
Life
summary
How to get a better life.
type
Post
Happiness
1. You don’t have to love your job. Jobs are a way to make money. Many people live fine lives in okay jobs by using the money they make on things they care about.
2. Sturgeon’s law states that 90% of everything is crap. If you dislike poetry, or fine art, or anything, it’s possible you’ve only ever seen the crap. Go looking!
3. People don’t realize how much they hate commuting. A nice house farther from work is not worth the fraction of your life you are giving to boredom and fatigue.
4. There’s some evidence that introverts and extroverts both benefit from being pushed to be more extroverted. Consider this the next time you aren’t sure if you feel like going out.
Success
5. History remembers those who got to market first. Getting your creation out into the world is more important than getting it perfect.
6. Are you on the fence about breaking up or leaving your job? You should probably go ahead and do it. People, on average, end up happier when they take the plunge.
7. Done is better than perfect.
8. Discipline is superior to motivation. The former can be trained, the latter is fleeting. You won’t be able to accomplish great things if you’re only relying on motivation.
9. You can improve your communication skills with practice much more effectively than you can improve your intelligence with practice. If you’re not that smart but can communicate ideas clearly, you have a great advantage over everybody who can’t communicate clearly.
10. You do not live in a video game. There are no pop-up warnings if you’re about to do something foolish, or if you’ve been going in the wrong direction for too long. You have to create your own warnings.
11. If you listen to successful people talk about their methods, remember that all the people who used the same methods and failed did not make videos about it.
12. The best advice is personal and comes from somebody who knows you well. Take broad-spectrum advice like this as needed, but the best way to get help is to ask honest friends who love you.
13. Make accomplishing things as easy as possible. Find the easiest way to start exercising. Find the easiest way to start writing. People make things harder than they have to be and get frustrated when they can’t succeed. Try not to.
14. Cultivate a reputation for being dependable. Good reputations are valuable because they’re rare (easily destroyed and hard to rebuild). You don’t have to brew the most amazing coffee if your customers know the coffee will always be hot.
15. How you spend every day is how you spend your life.
Relationships
16. In relationships look for somebody you can enjoy just hanging out near. Long-term relationships are mostly spent just chilling.
17. Don’t complain about your partner to coworkers or online. The benefits are negligible and the cost is destroying a bit of your soul.
18. After a breakup, cease all contact as soon as practical. The potential for drama is endless, and the potential for a good friendship is negligible. Wait a year before trying to be friends again.
19. When dating, de-emphasizing your quirks will lead to 90% of people thinking you’re kind of alright. Emphasizing your quirks will lead to 10% of people thinking you’re fascinating and fun. Those are the people interested in dating you. Aim for them.
20. There are two red flags to avoid almost all dangerous people: 1. The perpetually aggrieved ; 2. The angry.
21. Those who generate anxiety in you and promise that they have the solution are grifters. See: politicians, marketers, new masculinity gurus, etc. Avoid these.
Body
22. The 20-20-20 rule: Every 20 minutes of screenwork, look at a spot 20 feet away for 20 seconds. This will reduce eye strain and is easy to remember (or program reminders for).
23. Exercise is the most important lifestyle intervention you can do. Even the bare minimum (15 minutes a week) has a huge impact. Start small.
24. Phones have gotten heavier in the last decade and they’re actually pretty hard on your wrists! Use a computer when it’s an alternative or try to at least prop up your phone.
Productivity
25. Learn keyboard shortcuts. They’re easy to learn and you’ll get tasks done faster and easier.
26. Keep your desk and workspace bare. Treat every object as an imposition upon your attention, because it is. A workspace is not a place for storing things. It is a place for accomplishing things.
27. Reward yourself after completing challenges, even badly.
Rationality
28. Noticing biases in others is easy, noticing biases in yourself is hard. However, it has a much higher pay-off.
29. Explaining problems is good. Often in the process of laying out a problem, a solution will present itself.
30. Selfish people should listen to advice to be more selfless, selfless people should listen to advice to be more selfish. This applies to many things. Whenever you receive advice, consider its opposite as well. You might be filtering out the advice you need most.
Compassion
31.Call your parents when you think of them, tell your friends when you love them.
32. Compliment people more. Many people have trouble thinking of themselves as smart, or pretty, or kind, unless told by someone else. You can help them out.
33. Don’t punish people for trying. You teach them to not try with you. Punishing includes whining that it took them so long, that they did it badly, or that others have done it better.
34.Don't punish people for admitting they were wrong, you make it harder for them to improve.
35. In general, you will look for excuses to not be kind to people. Resist these.
Possessions
36. Things you use for a significant fraction of your life (bed: 1/3rd, office-chair: 1/4th) are worth investing in.
37. “Where is the good knife?” If you’re looking for your good X, you have bad Xs. Throw those out.
38. If your work is done on a computer, get a second monitor. Less time navigating between windows means more time for thinking.
39. Establish clear rules about when to throw out old junk. Once clear rules are established, junk will probably cease to be a problem. This is because any rule would be superior to our implicit rules (“keep this broken stereo for five years in case I learn how to fix it”).
40. When buying things, time and money trade-off against each other. If you’re low on money, take more time to find deals. If you’re low on time, stop looking for great deals and just buy things quickly online.
Self
41. Deficiencies do not make you special. The older you get, the more your inability to cook will be a red flag for people.
42. If you’re under 90, try things.
43. Things that aren’t your fault can still be your responsibility.
44. Defining yourself by your suffering is an effective way to keep suffering forever (ex. incels, trauma).
45. Keep your identity small. “I’m not the kind of person who does things like that” is not an explanation, it’s a trap. It prevents nerds from working out and men from dancing.
46. Don’t confuse ‘doing a thing because I like it’ with ‘doing a thing because I want to be seen as the sort of person who does such things’.
47. Remember that you are dying.
48. Personal epiphanies feel great, but they fade within weeks. Upon having an epiphany, make a plan and start actually changing behavior.
Others
49. In choosing between living with 0-1 people vs 2 or more people, remember that ascertaining responsibility will no longer be instantaneous with more than one roommate (“whose dishes are these?”).
50. When you ask people, “What’s your favorite book / movie / band?” and they stumble, ask them instead what book / movie / band they’re currently enjoying most. They’ll almost always have one and be able to talk about it.
Happiness
1. You don’t have to love your job. Jobs are a way to make money. Many people live fine lives in okay jobs by using the money they make on things they care about.
2. Sturgeon’s law states that 90% of everything is crap. If you dislike poetry, or fine art, or anything, it’s possible you’ve only ever seen the crap. Go looking!
3. People don’t realize how much they hate commuting. A nice house farther from work is not worth the fraction of your life you are giving to boredom and fatigue.
4. There’s some evidence that introverts and extroverts both benefit from being pushed to be more extroverted. Consider this the next time you aren’t sure if you feel like going out.
Success
5. History remembers those who got to market first. Getting your creation out into the world is more important than getting it perfect.
6. Are you on the fence about breaking up or leaving your job? You should probably go ahead and do it. People, on average, end up happier when they take the plunge.
7. Done is better than perfect.
8. Discipline is superior to motivation. The former can be trained, the latter is fleeting. You won’t be able to accomplish great things if you’re only relying on motivation.
9. You can improve your communication skills with practice much more effectively than you can improve your intelligence with practice. If you’re not that smart but can communicate ideas clearly, you have a great advantage over everybody who can’t communicate clearly.
10. You do not live in a video game. There are no pop-up warnings if you’re about to do something foolish, or if you’ve been going in the wrong direction for too long. You have to create your own warnings.
11. If you listen to successful people talk about their methods, remember that all the people who used the same methods and failed did not make videos about it.
12. The best advice is personal and comes from somebody who knows you well. Take broad-spectrum advice like this as needed, but the best way to get help is to ask honest friends who love you.
13. Make accomplishing things as easy as possible. Find the easiest way to start exercising. Find the easiest way to start writing. People make things harder than they have to be and get frustrated when they can’t succeed. Try not to.
14. Cultivate a reputation for being dependable. Good reputations are valuable because they’re rare (easily destroyed and hard to rebuild). You don’t have to brew the most amazing coffee if your customers know the coffee will always be hot.
15. How you spend every day is how you spend your life.
Relationships
16. In relationships look for somebody you can enjoy just hanging out near. Long-term relationships are mostly spent just chilling.
17. Don’t complain about your partner to coworkers or online. The benefits are negligible and the cost is destroying a bit of your soul.
18. After a breakup, cease all contact as soon as practical. The potential for drama is endless, and the potential for a good friendship is negligible. Wait a year before trying to be friends again.
19. When dating, de-emphasizing your quirks will lead to 90% of people thinking you’re kind of alright. Emphasizing your quirks will lead to 10% of people thinking you’re fascinating and fun. Those are the people interested in dating you. Aim for them.
20. There are two red flags to avoid almost all dangerous people: 1. The perpetually aggrieved ; 2. The angry.
21. Those who generate anxiety in you and promise that they have the solution are grifters. See: politicians, marketers, new masculinity gurus, etc. Avoid these.
Body
22. The 20-20-20 rule: Every 20 minutes of screenwork, look at a spot 20 feet away for 20 seconds. This will reduce eye strain and is easy to remember (or program reminders for).
23. Exercise is the most important lifestyle intervention you can do. Even the bare minimum (15 minutes a week) has a huge impact. Start small.
24. Phones have gotten heavier in the last decade and they’re actually pretty hard on your wrists! Use a computer when it’s an alternative or try to at least prop up your phone.
Productivity
25. Learn keyboard shortcuts. They’re easy to learn and you’ll get tasks done faster and easier.
26. Keep your desk and workspace bare. Treat every object as an imposition upon your attention, because it is. A workspace is not a place for storing things. It is a place for accomplishing things.
27. Reward yourself after completing challenges, even badly.
Rationality
28. Noticing biases in others is easy, noticing biases in yourself is hard. However, it has a much higher pay-off.
29. Explaining problems is good. Often in the process of laying out a problem, a solution will present itself.
30. Selfish people should listen to advice to be more selfless, selfless people should listen to advice to be more selfish. This applies to many things. Whenever you receive advice, consider its opposite as well. You might be filtering out the advice you need most.
Compassion
31.Call your parents when you think of them, tell your friends when you love them.
32. Compliment people more. Many people have trouble thinking of themselves as smart, or pretty, or kind, unless told by someone else. You can help them out.
33. Don’t punish people for trying. You teach them to not try with you. Punishing includes whining that it took them so long, that they did it badly, or that others have done it better.
34.Don't punish people for admitting they were wrong, you make it harder for them to improve.
35. In general, you will look for excuses to not be kind to people. Resist these.
Possessions
36. Things you use for a significant fraction of your life (bed: 1/3rd, office-chair: 1/4th) are worth investing in.
37. “Where is the good knife?” If you’re looking for your good X, you have bad Xs. Throw those out.
38. If your work is done on a computer, get a second monitor. Less time navigating between windows means more time for thinking.
39. Establish clear rules about when to throw out old junk. Once clear rules are established, junk will probably cease to be a problem. This is because any rule would be superior to our implicit rules (“keep this broken stereo for five years in case I learn how to fix it”).
40. When buying things, time and money trade-off against each other. If you’re low on money, take more time to find deals. If you’re low on time, stop looking for great deals and just buy things quickly online.
Self
41. Deficiencies do not make you special. The older you get, the more your inability to cook will be a red flag for people.
42. If you’re under 90, try things.
43. Things that aren’t your fault can still be your responsibility.
44. Defining yourself by your suffering is an effective way to keep suffering forever (ex. incels, trauma).
45. Keep your identity small. “I’m not the kind of person who does things like that” is not an explanation, it’s a trap. It prevents nerds from working out and men from dancing.
46. Don’t confuse ‘doing a thing because I like it’ with ‘doing a thing because I want to be seen as the sort of person who does such things’.
47. Remember that you are dying.
48. Personal epiphanies feel great, but they fade within weeks. Upon having an epiphany, make a plan and start actually changing behavior.
Others
49. In choosing between living with 0-1 people vs 2 or more people, remember that ascertaining responsibility will no longer be instantaneous with more than one roommate (“whose dishes are these?”).
50. When you ask people, “What’s your favorite book / movie / band?” and they stumble, ask them instead what book / movie / band they’re currently enjoying most. They’ll almost always have one and be able to talk about it.
幸福
- 你不必热爱你的工作。工作是赚钱的一种方式。许多人通过将他们赚的钱用于他们关心的事情，在普通的工作中过着不错的生活。
- 斯特金定律指出，90%的事物都是垃圾。如果你不喜欢诗歌、精美艺术或任何东西，可能你只见过那些垃圾。去寻找吧！
- 人们没有意识到他们有多讨厌通勤。离工作较远的好房子并不值得你为无聊和疲惫而付出的生命的一小部分。
- 有一些证据表明，内向者和外向者都能从被推动变得更加外向中受益。下次当你不确定是否想出去时，可以考虑这一点。
成功
- 历史记住那些最先进入市场的人。将你的创作推向世界比使其完美更为重要。
- 你是否在考虑分手或辞职？你可能应该去做。人们通常在做出决定后会更快乐。
- 完成比完美更好。
- 自律优于动机。前者可以训练，后者则是短暂的。如果你只依赖动机，你将无法成就伟大的事情。
- 通过练习，你可以更有效地提高你的沟通技巧，而不是通过练习提高你的智力。如果你不是很聪明，但能够清晰地表达想法，那么你就比那些无法清晰沟通的人拥有更大的优势。
- 你并不生活在一个视频游戏中。如果你即将做一些愚蠢的事情，或者你已经走错方向太久了，就没有弹出警告。你必须自己创造警告。
- 如果你听成功人士谈论他们的方法，请记住，所有使用相同方法但失败的人并没有制作关于此的视频。
- 最好的建议是个人化的，来自于了解你的人。根据需要接受这样的广泛建议，但获得帮助的最佳方式是向诚实的、爱你的人求助。
- 让完成事情变得尽可能简单。找到开始锻炼的最简单方法。找到开始写作的最简单方法。人们往往把事情搞得比实际更复杂，当他们无法成功时会感到沮丧。尽量不要这样。
- 培养可靠的声誉。良好的声誉是宝贵的，因为它们稀缺（容易被破坏且难以重建）。如果你的顾客知道咖啡总是热的，你就不必冲泡最美味的咖啡。
- 你如何度过每一天，就是你如何度过你的一生。
关系
- 在关系中，寻找一个你可以享受在一起闲逛的人。长期关系大多数时间都是在放松中度过的。
- 不要在同事或网上抱怨你的伴侣。好处微乎其微，而代价是摧毁你灵魂的一部分。
- 分手后，尽快停止所有联系。戏剧化的可能性是无穷无尽的，而建立良好友谊的可能性微乎其微。等一年再尝试做朋友。
- 在约会时，淡化你的怪癖会让 90%的人觉得你还不错。强调你的怪癖会让 10%的人觉得你很迷人和有趣。那些人对和你约会感兴趣。瞄准他们。
- 有两个红旗可以避免几乎所有危险的人：1. 永远感到委屈的人；2. 愤怒的人。
- 那些让你感到焦虑并承诺有解决方案的人是骗子。参见：政治家、营销人员、新男性主义导师等。避免这些。
身体
- 20-20-20 法则：每工作 20 分钟，向 20 英尺外的地方看 20 秒。这将减少眼睛疲劳，并且容易记住（或设置提醒）。
- 锻炼是你可以做的最重要的生活方式干预。即使是最低限度（每周 15 分钟）也会产生巨大的影响。小步开始。
- 过去十年里手机变得越来越重，实际上对手腕相当不利！可以的话就使用电脑，或者至少试着把手机支撑起来。
生产力
- 学习键盘快捷键。它们容易学习，你会更快更轻松地完成任务。
- 保持你的桌子和工作空间简洁。把每个物体都视为对你注意力的干扰，因为它确实是。工作空间不是存放物品的地方，而是完成事情的地方。
- 完成挑战后奖励自己，即使做得不好。
理性
- 注意他人的偏见很容易，注意自己的偏见却很难。然而，这样做的回报要高得多。
- 解释问题是好的。在阐述问题的过程中，解决方案往往会自然而然地出现。
- 自私的人应该听取建议，变得更加无私；无私的人应该听取建议，变得更加自私。这适用于许多事情。每当你收到建议时，也要考虑其相反的意见。你可能正在过滤掉你最需要的建议。
同情
- 当你想起父母时给他们打电话，当你爱朋友时告诉他们。
- 多赞美别人。许多人在没有别人告诉他们的情况下，很难认为自己聪明、漂亮或善良。你可以帮助他们。
- 不要因为人们尝试而惩罚他们。你是在教他们不要和你尝试。惩罚包括抱怨他们花了太长时间，做得不好，或者其他人做得更好。
- 不要惩罚那些承认自己错了的人，这会让他们更难改进。
- 一般来说，你会找借口不对人友善。抵制这些。
财物
- 你在生活中使用很大一部分时间的东西（床：三分之一，办公椅：四分之一）值得投资。
- “好刀在哪里？”如果你在寻找你的好 X，那你就有坏 X。把那些扔掉。
- 如果你的工作是在电脑上完成的，建议使用第二个显示器。减少在窗口之间切换的时间意味着有更多时间思考。
- 制定明确的规则，关于何时丢弃旧杂物。一旦建立了明确的规则，杂物问题可能就会得到解决。这是因为任何规则都优于我们隐含的规则（“把这个坏音响留五年，以防我学会修理它”）。
- 在购买东西时，时间和金钱相互权衡。如果你缺钱，就花更多时间寻找优惠。如果你时间紧迫，就不要再寻找好交易，直接在线快速购买。
自我
- 缺陷并不会让你变得特别。你越老，烹饪能力的不足就越会成为人们的警示信号。
- 如果你不到 90 岁，尝试一些事情。
- 不是你错的事情仍然可以是你的责任。
- 通过痛苦来定义自己是一种有效的方式，让痛苦永远存在（例如，单身男性，创伤）。
- 保持你的身份认同小一些。"我不是那种做这种事的人"不是一个解释，而是一个陷阱。它阻止书呆子锻炼身体，阻止男人跳舞。
- 不要把“因为我喜欢而做某事”与“因为我想被看作是那种做这种事的人”混淆。
- 记住你正在死去。
- 个人的顿悟感觉很好，但它们在几周内就会消退。在获得顿悟后，制定一个计划并开始真正改变行为。
其他人
- 在选择与0-1人还是2人或更多人一起生活时，要记住，超过一个室友时，确定责任将不再是瞬间的事（"这些碗是谁的？"）。
- 当你问人们：“你最喜欢的书/电影/乐队是什么？”他们犹豫不决时，可以问他们目前最喜欢的书/电影/乐队是什么。他们几乎总会有一个，并且能够谈论它。